Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Caleb's beginning

It's been 13 years since Caleb has joined our family. I remember everything about his Gotcha Day, in Russia. I had court, and our facilitator was not prepared. On the way to the courthouse, he grabbed an older gentleman off the street who was able to speak English, and had him be my interpreter in court. That. Really. Happened. Crazy. After court, I paid the man in private, because if Sergei had witnessed it, he would most likely con the guy out of his money. Sergei was like that, very sneaky, a liar, and very inappropriate. At every turn, he was telling me, that I had to give him money for this and that, or I wouldn't be able to adopt Caleb. He was a snake. (It wasn't until 3 years later, that I learned he never turned in 2 of my post placements. That was fixed by getting new ones apostilled again, and submitted by a different adoption facilitator.) Anyway, after court, I went straight to the orphanage to pick up Caleb. It felt so good to be walking out with him, after the 6 months of terror put upon me by Sergei. Nightmarish, is a perfect word to describe him. I was naive, and didn't know how adoptions worked, and he kept me terrified of losing Caleb, to keep the money flowing.
Caleb's adoption was difficult, but well worth it. He came from a very small military town. People there were very poor. His orphanage had buggies(stroller) that looked like they came from the 50's, no toilet paper, no swings on the swing set, nothing. I sat in a meeting with the director during my first trip, and she was given some donations of clothes in a duffle bag. At the bottom of the bag, they found an expired bottle of ear drops. Weird, I know. But, she took them and said she needed them for the children. I never saw any other children, but Sergei assured me during one visit that one of them needed surgery and told me they needed $100 immediately for it. I paid it. Yes, I know, stupid, because I know it went straight into his pocket. At the time, I did not.
Once out of the orphanage, Caleb was so curious to see everything, he looked out the window of the car, the entire time, when he wasn't standing up yelling out the back window. He wanted to let everyone know, that he was free, I imagine. :) I thought about his birth family. I'm sure they couldn't have been more than a couple miles away, at the time. I wished so badly, that I could tell them, how much Caleb was loved already, and how well I would take care of him and give him a good life. But, I was told, that no, that could never happen. So we drove away from that little town, with me trying to take in as much as I could, to try and remember it all. This was where my son was born, this was his beginning in life.




All he wanted to do was go outside. That day was sad, because Sergei kept lying about which day court was. It was supposed to be that day, and it wasn't. I demanded to go see Caleb, so he sent me there in a car. I was heartbroken, I couldn't take Caleb outside. :(

This was the house across the parking lot from the orphanage. 
Such poverty across this country, that most people never see. They think of Russia and they think of Moscow. It's a much different atmosphere once you leave Moscow.

Here is Caleb's orphanage. They basically had nothing, not even toilet paper. There was a stack of old papers beside the toilet to use instead.

In case of a fire at the orphanage. Crazy. 

Not sure how old these were, but these were used for the babies still. I was there in 2005.

Finally! I had court, and then was driven right away to the orphanage to pick up Caleb. 
This was the first time in 6 months, that things went right!

All dressed in his new clothes and boy, was he ready!

Saying good-bye to the orphanage director. 
She didn't know what to think. 
No one came for handicapped children. 
Caleb was the first in this area.